To love and to be loved, is something we humans crave for. At least, some of us do. But, it hurts when the important one leaves us suddenly..
When I was in college and lost my mom to stroke, I made a friend online. Soon we became best friends. One day I casually told him about a crush I had on someone. This was the time when he realised he had feelings for me and couldn’t let go of me. He proposed but I told him I really don’t have romantic feelings for him. No, my intentions were not to friend zone him! I just didn’t feel attracted to him. He didn’t take no for an answer, he started coming to meet me every weekend from a city five hours from mine.
Each weekend we would meet and he would convince me of how great we would be given our love for books, drawing, puzzles and quizzes. He used to wait hours outside my college. He treated my friends wonderfully! Even my friends started asking me why I would let go of such a genuine and nice guy.
He was intelligent, thoughtful, creative, sensitive and very mature. He had lost his parents and was taking care of his grandmom and brother. One weekend, I asked him to stop trying to convince me and I said we can only be friends if you never talk about this again. I still remember how I stormed off towards the escalator at the metro station while he simply stood there, numb and teary eyed.I felt like a monster.
I sent him a sorry message and called him the next day to make sure he is okay. He talked me for a minute. Then he switched off his phone. Many times i wanted to meet him to say him that i also love him and want to marry him. But he never met me after that. I was so worried about him. But i was helpless. After waiting him for many years. Then i got married with my first crush. Istill miss him. If i got married with him i may be the happiest. Because in relationship the one who is loved gets much freedom then the one who loves the other. Sometimes i think how can i get him back. But everything has changed now. The only thing i am doing is praying for him.... Isn't it enough now..
Thanks for reading and keep sharing..
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